“Have to” versus “Want to”


How many of us have a huge list of things we ‘have to’ do on a daily or weekly basis these days?

It seems there is a never ending list of ‘have to’s’ whether it is cleaning the house, going to work, helping others or keeping in contact with friends and family that we feel we are just too busy to allow the time to do.

A couple of years ago at a seminar I came across a model of the ‘Have to – Want to’ spectrum.  It was totally new to me that the two of these seemingly opposing concepts were actually only two aspects of a whole.  The idea that everything that you perceive as a have to is merely a choice that you make seemed both crazy and revolutionary at the same time.  The more I thought about it the more I saw that this model was really quite accurate.  Everything we perceive as a ‘have to’ is really a ‘want to’ in disguise.  It is really just a matter of perspective.  “I have to pay taxes, car registration, grocery bills” does actually come down to choice.  Do you want to live in the country that you are paying taxes in and enjoy the comforts which those taxes provide such as security, infrastructure and the way of life that come with that culture?  Do you want to enjoy the freedom that comes with being able to drive wherever you want in the car that you pay to register and maintain?  Do you want to nourish your body with the nutrients it needs to keep you healthy and strong so you can have a great life free of illness?  These are the choices we make behind the facade of the ‘have to’ banner.

I think it is really easy to get lost in the demands of hectic lifestyles and change all of our ‘want to’s’ into ‘have to’s’.  I struggle with it myself a lot.  I think perhaps it is an ongoing task that we have to keep reminding ourselves exactly why it is that we are doing what we are doing.  Having a vision board or creating a Mind Map for where we want to go is really helpful to remind us of the why.

So my question for you today is;

How do you stay focused on your why?

How do you change the ‘Have to’s’ into ‘Want to’s’

Some other blogs;

Have to v’s Want to

The Epic Difference between Want to and Have to

This entry was posted in Growth and Change, Inspiration, Personal Transformation and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to “Have to” versus “Want to”

  1. mattissimo says:

    Great perspectives on the choices we have!

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